Sal Feels He Was Misrepresented
Hey, folks. Sal is a little angry. Some fruitcake posted this thing about Sal on Wikipedia that says some stuff about Sal that is just not true.
This thing here says that Sal's favorite love song is "Every Rose Has Its Thorn," by Poison. This is what we in baseball call "bullshit."
The truth is that "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" by Poison is Sal's favorite song. NOT Sal's favorite love song.
Here's the straight talk comin': Sal knows what is necessary when tryin' to woo a lady or woman. When you woo, a lady or woman enjoys bein' told what's good about her. She does NOT enjoy bein' told she's great...BUT here's what's wrong with her.
Recently wooed ladies or women like feelin' like a rose. NOT a rose with a thorn. For example, if you were a lady or a woman would you try to woo Sal by sayin', "Hey Sal. You're a great catcher, and you can hit sometimes, too," or, "Sal, you had a great fu manchu. It looked good on your face. But you know what, Sal? There's all this good stuff about you, but you have a big fat can, Sal. It is fat"?
This is not a good way to woo. So Sal does not think "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" by Poison is a love song.
So, please, when wooin' or lookin' for a love song, choose one of Sal's real favorites like, "Love is a Many Splendored Thing" by the Four Aces, or, "I Will Always Love You" by Dolly Parton, or, "Freak'n You" by Jodeci.
One good thing Sal can say about Wikipedia is that somebody took the time to figure out what Sal would look like if his new team (can't mention which one) let him keep his fu manchu. It looks like this:
This thing here says that Sal's favorite love song is "Every Rose Has Its Thorn," by Poison. This is what we in baseball call "bullshit."
The truth is that "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" by Poison is Sal's favorite song. NOT Sal's favorite love song.
Here's the straight talk comin': Sal knows what is necessary when tryin' to woo a lady or woman. When you woo, a lady or woman enjoys bein' told what's good about her. She does NOT enjoy bein' told she's great...BUT here's what's wrong with her.
Recently wooed ladies or women like feelin' like a rose. NOT a rose with a thorn. For example, if you were a lady or a woman would you try to woo Sal by sayin', "Hey Sal. You're a great catcher, and you can hit sometimes, too," or, "Sal, you had a great fu manchu. It looked good on your face. But you know what, Sal? There's all this good stuff about you, but you have a big fat can, Sal. It is fat"?
This is not a good way to woo. So Sal does not think "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" by Poison is a love song.
So, please, when wooin' or lookin' for a love song, choose one of Sal's real favorites like, "Love is a Many Splendored Thing" by the Four Aces, or, "I Will Always Love You" by Dolly Parton, or, "Freak'n You" by Jodeci.
One good thing Sal can say about Wikipedia is that somebody took the time to figure out what Sal would look like if his new team (can't mention which one) let him keep his fu manchu. It looks like this:
posted by Sal at 11:59 PM
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