Sal Hits a New Low

Hey, folks. Sal realizes he ain't been writin' much lately and he thought he owed you, his loyal readers, an explanation as to why.

See, the other day Sal bottomed out. He did something that he ain't too proud of.

Let's get something out there right away: Sal know he ain't the greatest player in the league, or on his team, or - on some days - in the stands. So Sal has learned to live wit' a bit of jeerin' and fun-makin' and the occasional wisenheimerin' at Sal's expense. But two days ago Sal had enough.

Here's the straight-talk comin': Sal has no problem wit' some jocularizin' from his teammates. It's character buildin'. He also has no problem wit' a little bit of lampoonin' from the fellas on the other team. The umps can tease Sal, the fans can heckle. But one guy...one guy got no right to say stuff to Sal or to mock Sal or to even do a little bit of Sal parodyin'.

And two days ago this guy did it.

He came out of the dugout wit' a fake fu manchu and pillows in his shirt. Then he did some strike-out feignin'. This got Sal steamed. Sal lost control. He beat the guy. Kicked him. Did some bat-bludgeonin'. Then the worst thing happened.

Sal ripped his head off.

This ain't no joke, Pals. Sal did it...and once the authorities catch wind of it, Sal may be headin' for the Big House.

If you don't believe Sal, here are some pictures of his victim.

BEFORE

AFTER

Sal's not sure why he stuck around to take a picture before fleein', but he did. Anyways, if anybody out there is willin' to put up some bail money - let Sal know. Backup catchers don't make as much as some of them other fellas.

Sal Chases Aaron

Just 708 left to go.